quotes

"Tread softly because you tread on my dreams." William Butler Yeats

loving relationships, stories

While I agree with the majority of points in this article, one thing I doubt is his statement that "The idea that two people can be happy together, maturing alongside each other seems as false as a fairy tale." I truly believe this kind of relationship exists and can be achieved. It's about being supportive, open-minded, communicative and responsive. Relationships are failing because they have become "what can this person do for me?" rather than, "what can we do for each other?" People are increasingly judgmental of others and never remember to reflect back on themselves. I also know that I've never wanted to have that casual relationship or hook up on the first night.

Let’s Not Get to Know Each Other Better by Joel Walkowski from the NYTimes

A FEW months ago I liked a girl — a fairly common occurrence. But being slightly ambitious and drunk, I decided to ask her out on a date.

This was a weird choice, as I’m not sure I know anyone who has ever had a real date. Most elect to hang out, hook up, or Skype long-distance relations. The idea of a date (asking in advance, spending rent money on dinner and dealing with the initial awkwardness) is far too concrete and unnecessary. As the adage goes: Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free? Why pay for dinner if you can sit around watching TV? If you stay at home, you hardly even need to stand up, let alone put on a nice shirt.

Despite misgivings, this particular foray felt legitimate, a coming-of-age moment straight out of a John Hughes movie. I had always wanted to go on a real date: flowers, dinner and all that. I thought that maybe in doing so I would feel more like an adult and less like a dumb little boy.

So I called this girl, feeling a little sleazy as I searched for the right words: “Hey, um, this is Joel. Do you want to, like, go out? On a date?”

“O.K.,” she said uncertainly, no doubt suspicious the whole thing was a joke.

Her positive response did nothing to calm my jitters. Give me a party, a front porch gathering, or a random encounter, and I’m comfortable talking to anyone. But this kind of formal planning unnerved me. Riding my bike home, I realized I didn’t even know what a real date was, beyond some vague Hollywood notion.

In my 21 years, I have had my share of trysts and one-night stands. I’ve been in love. I know it was love because I shamelessly clung to her. I have had my share of ups and downs but have no idea if I’m doing the whole love thing right or wrong. We don’t tend to define it that way.

In this age of cyberselves, with hookups just a Craigslist ad away, the game has evolved to the point of no rules. It’s not the ’50s where I can ask some lucky girl to wear my pin and take a ride in daddy’s car. This change probably benefits me in the end, as I’m sure an offer of a ride in my dad’s Sable would be swiftly rejected.

For my generation, friendship often morphs into a sexual encounter and then reverts to friendship the next day. And it’s easy as long as you don’t put yourself on the line or try too hard. Don’t have a prospect? Check Facebook. Afraid to call? Text.

With so many avenues for communication, one might expect an onslaught of romantic soliloquies, but that isn’t the case. Casual is sexy. Caring is creepy. You don’t want to show your hand, and you certainly don’t want to fall in love. At least until you do, and by then it’s too late.

Planned romance is viewed as nothing more than ambition, so it’s important that things be allowed to happen naturally. Sex is great, and so are some relationships, but not to the point that they should be actively pursued.

It’s hard to even flirt with a girl without feeling obvious and embarrassed, since the greatest displays of cheesiness come from the pursuit, making it disgusting: “Oh, you drive a Volvo? What’s that like?” Realizing I’m flirting, I cringe and do my best to restrain myself. An encounter is best when unsullied by intentions, leaving lust or boredom to take over.

The typical sequence goes like this: Friends meet up at some sort of bonfire or impromptu game of night volleyball. Maybe that girl from your history class is there, and you start to talk. Neither of you has expectations. But just hanging out and swapping stories, laughing a little, creates a spark and the attraction builds, eventually leading to the big wet kiss that changes everything and nothing.

This is the perfect hookup, a pressure-free surprise. With a stranger, everything is new and acceptable. Her quirks are automatically endearing. This first encounter is the perfect place, but where does it lead?

In the best case, nowhere at all. The next time you see her in class, you act the same as you did before, and so does she, except for the knowledge you share that what happened last week might happen again.

If it continues, you have an understanding, physical chemistry and great conversations. You meet two or three times a week for no-strings sex and long-winded philosophical talks.

Most importantly, you aren’t lonely. Maybe deep in the recesses of your mind you think about possibly loving this person. What’s the standard response? Nothing. If she asks, “How do you feel about me?” you answer from the heart: “I see you as an unexpected treat from the heavens. I don’t know how I deserve this.”

Your relationship is good. Your relationship is strong. But it isn’t a relationship, and that’s the key. You aren’t hoping she will become your girlfriend, and ideally she is not looking for anything more, either.

A friend of mine, a normal girl who is neither especially social nor aloof, engages in hookups unabashedly — she’s just doing what she wants and doesn’t regret or overthink it. Except for one time when she woke up in some guy’s embrace, got out of bed and noticed his bookshelf.

I’m not sure what it was about the contents that impressed or moved her; maybe the books suggested a gentle soul. All I know is what she told me: “I only felt bad after seeing his books.” The books had made him a real person, I guess, one she liked. Or pitied. Because then it was on to the next.

I might not be a typical youth, and maybe my friends aren’t typical, either, but hardly anyone I know aspires to be “that guy” or “that girl,” those once-dynamic individuals who “found someone” and suddenly weren’t so cool. On some level, we envy the scope of their feelings, but we certainly don’t want to become them.

But staying out of relationships can be just as much work as maintaining one. After hooking up with the same person several times I’m sometimes haunted by the “Relationship Status” question on Facebook, and I’ll linger over the button, wondering whether to make the leap from fun to obligation. I envision holding hands, meeting her parents and getting matching ankle tattoos.

Then I come to my senses and close the window.

Sometimes, though, it’s not up to me. I work at one of the campus libraries, and for some obscure reason my bosses, who are mostly middle-aged and female, decided to hold a Library Prom. I had to take someone, so I asked a girl, one of the truly rare fish worth catching (or being caught by).

That didn’t stop me from introducing her as “my friend.”

Which didn’t stop one of my bosses from asking, “Are you two dating?”

“Yeah,” she said.

“Um, we are?”

“Well, this is a date, isn’t it?”

She had me trapped. I nodded blankly. With one word, she had changed everything. Now I’m asked about her at work, even though she is currently hooking up with a friend of mine.

I wish I could explain this to the librarians. They’re sympathetic to my other complaints: about studying, about having my license suspended, about taking care of my pet chicken, and so on. “I was there once,” they tell me. “You’ll be fine.”

But when it comes to love, all they can say is, “How’s that girlfriend of yours?”

Maybe this disconnect has always existed. As one of my classmates, a genteel 60-year-old, said to me, “Every generation thinks they discovered sex.” Which might be true, but I’m not sure any previous generation has our plethora of options and utter lack of protocol. This may reflect how our media obsession has desensitized and hypersexualized us.

But I think it goes beyond that. Our short attention spans tend to be measured in nanoseconds. We float from room to room watching TV, surfing the Internet, playing Frisbee and finding satisfaction around every corner, if only for a moment.

Out of fear, we shrink ourselves. There have been many times I should have cried but stifled the tears. Instances where I should have said, “I love you” but made a joke instead. Once, a girl dumped me and it nearly ruined me. How bad was it? I ate nothing but Wendy’s for an entire week.

I’m fairly certain I could have saved the entire endeavor with a soul-baring soliloquy of what was true and what mattered to me, but I couldn’t muster the courage. I don’t know many who can.

We’ve grown up in an age of rampant divorce and the accompanying tumult. The idea that two people can be happy together, maturing alongside each other, seems as false as a fairy tale. So when a relationship ends, it isn’t seen as bad. It’s held as evidence that the relationship was never any good to begin with.

MAYBE it’s just that we have learned nothing can compare to the perfect moment of the unexpected hookup — wet lips on the beach, lying in the sand — and so we aim to accumulate as many as possible. Or maybe we’re simply too immature to commit. That has been the rap against guys forever, but now women think the same way. With the world (and the world of sex) at our fingertips, it’s difficult to choose, to settle, to compromise.

But I do occasionally wonder: If we can’t get past ourselves and learn to sacrifice to be with another, then what is in store? A generation of selfish go-getters fueled by nothing more than our own egos, forever seeking that rare dose of self-esteem? An era of loneliness filled with commercial wants and mate selection based on the shallowest of criteria?

As a staunch proponent of my generation, I believe that, despite what it may seem, we appreciate the ways of love and affection but are simply waiting for them to take over. We might dally in the land of easy sex and stilted text-message flirtation, but deep down we crave the warm embrace of all-consuming love.

I do, anyway. What else could have been behind my crazy idea to ask a girl out on a date? Alas, she and I ended up going to Chili’s and never went out again. Welcome to adulthood.

quotes, love

Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses. -Ann Landers


If you would be loved, love and be lovable. - Ben Franklin (Poor Richard)

dogs

The evolutionary relationships between human and dog amazes me. I love reading about how both species have changed over time in response to contact with one another.


Good dog, Smart dog

Life as a Labradoodle may sound free and easy, but if you’re Jet, who lives in New Jersey, there is a lot of work to be done.

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Ross Macdonald

He is both a seizure alert dog and a psychiatric service dog whose owner has epilepsy, severe anxiety, depression, various phobias and hypoglycemia. Jet has been trained to anticipate seizures, panic attacks and plunging blood sugar and will alert his owner to these things by staring intently at her until she does something about the problem. He will drop a toy in her lap to snap her out of a dissociative state. If she has a seizure, he will position himself so that his body is under her head to cushion a fall.

Jet seems like a genius, but is he really so smart? In fact, is any of it in his brain, or is it mostly in his sniff?

The matter of what exactly goes on in the mind of a dog is a tricky one, and until recently much of the research on canine intelligence has been met with large doses of skepticism. But over the last several years a growing body of evidence, culled from small scientific studies of dogs’ abilities to do things like detect cancer or seizures, solve complex problems (complex for a dog, anyway), and learn language suggests that they may know more than we thought they did.

Their apparent ability to tune in to the needs of psychiatric patients, turning on lights for trauma victims afraid of the dark, reminding their owners to take medication and interrupting behaviors like suicide attempts and self-mutilation, for example, has lately attracted the attention of researchers.

In September, the Army announced that it would spend $300,000 to study the impact of pairing psychiatric service dogs like Jet with soldiers returning from Iraq and Afghanistan with post-traumatic stress disorder. Both the House and Senate have recently passed bills that would finance the training and placement of these dogs with veterans.

Hungarian researchers reported in a study last year that a guide dog for a blind and epileptic person became anxious before its master suffered a seizure and was taught to bark and lick the owner’s face and upper arm when it detected an onset, three to five minutes before the seizure. It is still somewhat mysterious how exactly dogs detect seizures, whether it’s by picking up on behavioral changes or smelling something awry, but several small studies have shown that a powerful sense of smell can detect lung and other types of cancer, as the dogs sniff out odors emitted by the disease.

Beyond these perceptual abilities, in which trainers can use the dogs’ natural instincts, some research has examined dogs’ actual cognitive ability, and found not just good doggie, but smart doggie.

“I believe that so much research has come out lately suggesting that we may have underestimated certain aspects of the mental ability of dogs that even the most hardened cynic has to think twice before rejecting the possibilities,” said Stanley Coren, a psychology professor at the University of British Columbia and an author of several books on dogs.

Dr. Coren’s work on intelligence, along with other research suggesting that the canine brain processes information something like the way people do, has drawn criticism. And there is good reason. For most of the last century the specter of a horse named Clever Hans hung over anyone who tried to prove that dogs were acting in thoughtful ways — not merely mimicking or manipulating people into believing that they in fact grasped human concepts.

Clever Hans was said to be able to count, make change and tell time by tapping his hoof, until investigators in the early 1900s learned that Hans was merely responding to his trainer’s body language, tapping when the trainer nodded his head. This provided an enduring example for those who believed thought was the exclusive domain of humans.

But in 2004, German researchers reported that a border collie named Rico could learn the name of an object in one try, had 200 objects in his repertoire and remembered them all a month later, all very human. Even skeptical animal behavior researchers found the Rico results impressive and sound. Is it possible that Rico turned the tide on the Clever Hans problem, even though there is debate about how we can reliably measure what dogs know?

By giving dogs language learning and other tests devised for infants and toddlers, Dr. Coren has come up with an intelligence ranking of 100 breeds, with border collies at No. 1. He says the most intelligent breeds (poodles, retrievers, Labradors and shepherds) can learn as many as 250 words, signs and signals, while the others can learn 165. The average dog is about as intellectually advanced as a 2- to 2-and-a-half-year-old child, he has concluded, with an ability to understand some abstract concepts. For example, the animal can get “the idea of being a dog” by differentiating photographs with dogs in them from photographs without dogs.

But Clive D. L. Wynne, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Florida who specializes in canine cognition and has himself said he met a border collie who knew 1,500 words, takes issue with efforts to compare human and canine brains.

He argues that it is dogs’ deep sensitivity to the humans around them, their obedience under rigorous training, and their desire to please that can explain most of these capabilities. They may be deft at reading human cues — and teachable — but that doesn’t mean they are thinking like people, he says. A dog’s entire world revolves around its primary owner, and it will respond to that person to get what it wants, usually food, treats or affection.

“I take the view that dogs have their own unique way of thinking,” Dr. Wynne said. “It’s a happy accident that doggie thinking and human thinking overlap enough that we can have these relationships with dogs, but we shouldn’t kid ourselves that dogs are viewing the world the way we do.”

loving relationships

I for the most part believe this article is correct -- though to me, one can't compliment and say I love you enough. Also, I think the age difference is too emphasized -- it is nice to be able to grow and change with a person, and if one party is already set in their ways there really is little depth as a couple. People need a shared past, present and future in order to truly understand each other.

Revealed: The perfect formula for a happy marriage.. wife must be younger and brighter

Oct 27 2009 By Gayle Ritchie

SO much for candlelit dinners, romantic weekends away and showering your other half with compliments...

Scientists reckon the secret to a happy marriage is easy - the woman should be smarter than the man and at least five years younger.

They developed a distinctly unromantic formula to predict how compatible a couple are, based on their ages, education and relationship history.

Academics studied interviews of more than 1500 couples who were married or in a serious relationship. Five years later they followed up 1000 of the couples.

From this they were able to work out the factors that create a marriage made in heaven, and those that doom a relationship to failure.

They found if the wife is five or more years older than her husband, the couple are more than three times as likely to divorce than if they were the same age.

Where the husband is the elder by at least five years, the couples are less likely to part, according to the academics, including Dr Emmanuel Fragniere of the University of Bath.

The finding predicts a healthy future for pop star Beyonce Knowles, 28, and rapper husband Jay-Z, 39.

Jay-Z is older, but Beyonce has the better education, as her hubby failed to gain a diploma at high school.

The research might be less popular with actor Michael Douglas, 65, and his 40-year-old wife, Catherine Zeta Jones.

While they satisfy the age gap, they fail on another factor. The study found that a relationship is more likely to fail if one partner has a history of divorce - and this is Douglas' second marriage.

Here are some other theories which claim to form the basis of a happy marriage...

Couples should enjoy at least three cuddles a day. If you make the effort to hug, you'll reap the bonding benefits. Even a quick cuddle shows you care.

Whether a wee peck on the cheek or a full-on smooch, kisses are very important.To ensure a lasting marriage, the couple should enjoy at least four kisses a day.

Everyone needs to hear those little three words every once in a while. Saying "I love you" at least once a day ensures a durable match.

Couples should share two hobbies which they can enjoy on a regular basis.Whether mountain biking or going to the cinema, they should be equally passionate about the hobby.

Even if it means just fantasising about getting out to do those things together, being enthusiastic about something intensifies the bond.

Going out for two romantic meals a month will ensure a lasting liaison. The process of getting dressed up, picking out food and wine for one another and enjoying each other's company in a relaxed environment, allows you to focus on being happy. Just make sure the babysitter is free to look after the kids.

"Till death do us part couples" will often have met through friends and tied the knot after three and a half years. Having mutual friends increases the likelihood of having similar interests and staying with the same circle of people.

Happy husbands and wives keep in regular touch - even when they are at work - making at least three phone calls, text messages or emails a day. Maintaining contact shows you are thinking about the other person, regardless of how busy you are.

Couples should enjoy time out from each other, to pursue their own interests and bring something fresh back to the relationship.They should do this by enjoying at least two separate nights a month with friends.

It's important to keep an air of suspense about a relationship. The husband or wife should organise at least one surprise weekend away each year.

At least three nights a week should be spent snuggled up together watching TV or a film.This gives the couple a chance to get physically close and share.

Holidays are great for taking time out to relax, without the distraction of work and the daily routine. Try to get away for at least one holiday a year. Whether you're together in a cosy caravan or a plush hotel abroad, the experience is guaranteed to bring you closer.

Couples who look like each other are likely to stick together, according to a study by Professor David Perrett of the University of St Andrews. He reckons we're attracted to someone similar because they remind us of the faces we saw most in childhood - our parents.

It's important to make eye contact to attract a potential mate. Clear eyes show you're healthy and more likely to be fertile, say scientists.

They also believe we use smells to find a mate who has the right DNA combination to produce healthy kids. Studies reveal women give off a tell-tale body odour when they're at their most fertile, which is attractive to men. For women, the sweaty smell of a man boosts the blood flow to the part of the brain controlling sex.

fun projects and crafts; good friends

It's nice when good friends say wonderful things about you. Check out my dear friend Samantha's blog post about our mask party a few weeks ago in Durham. I thought my mask turned out pretty well and the boys tried so hard!



(I realize this isn't the greatest photo of me, but I was having fun!)

beauty and science

I was emailed the Journal article on the 30th -- it is saved in my email... posting a "social" (read: taken from College News) review of the paper.


Men and women both go for pretty faces…

....But there are differences in short and long-term relationships and male-female attractiveness

Kate Oczypok

So, when you’re out there looking for a mate, do you tend to go for a pretty face? Or more of a hot body? The Frisky recently reported that, in point of fact, men and women actually both go for the face over the body.

A new study said that men and women go for beautiful faces when they’re going for long-term relationships, but short-term ones are another story: women are more likely to go for nice faces over bodies but guys definitely wanted hot bodies over faces. The article quips, “gives a whole new meaning to the word phrase ‘butter face.’” How many of you have heard or used that term while in school?

The study, by Dr. Thomas E. Currie at the Royal Society University in London, assessed the relative importance of the face and body in judgments of human physical attractiveness, according to the Official Journal of the Human Behavior and Evolution Society. Basically, the results of the study suggest that faces and bodies signal different information about potential mates.

Touching further on the idea of the face, an article from psychcentral.com said that new research at the University of California Santa Barbara said that women pick up cues in men’s faces that show that they’re interested in children. They then use those to figure out if they’re attracted enough to have a long-term relationship with the guy.

So ladies, maybe next time you’re with a guy long-term, see if you subconsciously pick up on cues that you may be searching for his interest in having kids. Also, the more masculine a man’s face is, the more likely a woman is going to be attracted to them for a short-term relationship, according to Psych Central.

About this: My two best friends here are males and they always insist men choose women based on whether or not they have a pretty face. I used to not buy this but the more I think about it, the more I realize that maybe it’s true. The study is honestly what sold me. Girls like Megan Fox, or cougars perhaps, are boys’ things to have fun with for a bit. But in the long-term, if a guy wants to marry you, what actually matters is whether or not he thinks your face is attractive enough to stare at for 50-something years.

So what are your thoughts on face vs. body attractiveness?

10/1/09
http://www.collegenews.com/index.php?/dating/men_and_women_both_go_for_pretty_faces_10012009122323582/

happiness studies, traditionalism

looks like those traditional women are happier... probably because they are working for a larger purpose outside of the self [<--my goal] and providing ultimate care. (Or they are just ignorant and willfully oblivious...)
Conservatives Happier Than Liberals

By Jeanna Bryner, Senior Writer

posted: 07 May 2008 08:20 am ET


Individuals with conservative ideologies are happier than liberal-leaners, and new research pinpoints the reason: Conservatives rationalize social and economic inequalities.

Regardless of marital status, income or church attendance, right-wing individuals reported greater life satisfaction and well-being than left-wingers, the new study found. Conservatives also scored highest on measures of rationalization, which gauge a person's tendency to justify, or explain away, inequalities.

The rationalization measure included statements such as: "It is not really that big a problem if some people have more of a chance in life than others," and "This country would be better off if we worried less about how equal people are."

To justify economic inequalities, a person could support the idea of meritocracy, in which people supposedly move up their economic status in society based on hard work and good performance. In that way, one's social class attainment, whether upper, middle or lower, would be perceived as totally fair and justified.

If your beliefs don't justify gaps in status, you could be left frustrated and disheartened, according to the researchers, Jaime Napier and John Jost of New York University. They conducted a U.S.-centric survey and a more internationally focused one to arrive at the findings.

"Our research suggests that inequality takes a greater psychological toll on liberals than on conservatives," the researchers write in the June issue of the journal Psychological Science, "apparently because liberals lack ideological rationalizations that would help them frame inequality in a positive (or at least neutral) light."

The results support and further explain a Pew Research Center survey from 2006, in which 47 percent of conservative Republicans in the U.S. described themselves as "very happy," while only 28 percent of liberal Democrats indicated such cheer.

The same rationalizing phenomena could apply to personal situations as well.

"There is no reason to think that the effects we have identified here are unique to economic forms of inequality," the researchers write. "Research suggests that highly egalitarian women are less happy in their marriages compared with their more traditional counterparts, apparently because they are more troubled by disparities in domestic labor."

The current study was funded by the National Science Foundation.


There are several issues with all of this though -- one being how each group defines "happy" or what makes up "happy". I certainly believe that happiness has various gradations for every person... we the Pew Participants just ticking boxes?

evolution, clues to human origins

Hello Ardi! Welcome to our evolutionary tree! I'm posting the discovery news article because its the simpliest and most concise of articles I've encountered so far.


This is a drawing of what Ardipithecus ramidus ("Ardi") likely looked like. The 4.4 million-year-old hominid opens up a new chapter on human evolution because, as the lead researcher says, "it is as close as we have ever come to finding the last common ancestor of chimpanzees and humans."
J.H. Matternes/Science/AAAS

'Ardi,' Oldest Human Ancestor, Unveiled

"Ardi" dates to 4.4. million years and may be the oldest human ancestor ever found.

By Jennifer Viegas

The world's oldest and most complete skeleton of a potential human ancestor -- named "Ardi," short for Ardipithecus ramidus -- has been unveiled by an international team of 47 researchers.

Their unprecedented, 17-year investigation of Ardi is detailed in a special issue of the journal Science.

The 4.4 million-year-old hominid opens up a new chapter on human evolution because "it is as close as we have ever come to finding the last common ancestor of chimpanzees and humans," project co-director Tim White told Discovery News.

"This is not an ordinary fossil," added White, a paleontologist in the University of California at Berkeley's Human Evolution Research Center. "It's not a chimp. It's not a human."

Instead, he said, "It shows us what we used to be."

Placement on the Human History Timeline

The actual last common ancestor of chimps and humans probably lived between five and 10 million years ago, based on genetic and other estimates, so Ardi falls somewhere between this still unknown species and "Lucy," the famous 3.2 million-year-old "ape-man" hominid, also found in Ethiopia, belonging to the genus Australopithecus.

"If you dig up in younger time horizons at the site where Ardipithecus was found you have Australopithecus, so we feel that we are in a position to say that Ardipithecus may have given rise to Australopithecus, which in turn gave rise to Homo (sapiens)," White said.

Ardi, who was a female, may or may not have had any direct descendants. Her species may have given rise to Lucy's species, Australopithecus.

Bones Reveal Appearance and Behavior

Gen Suwa, one of the project's paleoanthropologists, spotted the very first Ardipithecus fossil in 1992 while conducting a foot survey in the Afar Rift in northeastern Ethiopia. Since that time, a total of 110 specimens representing a minimum of 36 different individuals of Ardi's species have been found within a sediment layer at the site that was precisely dated using multiple established techniques.

Ardi is the most complete of these individuals, as the skeleton includes her skull, teeth, arms, hands, pelvis, legs and feet. Based on these findings, the researchers know that she and others in her species were both tree- and land-dwelling omnivores. They had a relatively small, chimp-sized brain, long arms and short legs.

The scientists suspect Ardi used simple tools, such as twigs and leaves, but no stone tools were found at the dig site.

"Believe me, we've looked for them," said White, who added that the earliest known stone tools date to 2.6 million years ago.

The First Key Differences Between Hominids and Apes

Ardi could climb trees, using lengthy fingers and big toes for grasping, but she could also walk on the ground on two feet. Detecting that latter ability was critical for the scientists, as it appears two key features distinguished the very first hominid from other apes: walking with two feet on the ground and a reduction in the size of the canine teeth.

Both of these characteristics provide clues as to what might have caused the last common ancestor to diverge from other apes.

The Making of Families, Not War

"We now believe that social, instead of environmental, change, led to the species division," White explained. "Natural selection involves reproductive success, so Professor Owen Lovejoy of the project suspects that Ardipithecus males were probably pair-bonded to specific females, and may have aided them by gathering and carrying foods."

Such provisioning by males would have favored those males who could best walk on two feet, according to the researchers, allowing them free hands for carrying food. Provisioned females could have "intensified their parenting" and carried their infants, which is easier to do in woodland environments when the forelimbs are free.

The reduction in canine teeth, which Lovejoy called "weapons of aggression," further suggests that Ardipithecus males were not as physically hostile with each other as larger-canined chimpanzees are today.

Myth Busted: Humans Never Evolved From Chimpanzees

Although chimpanzees remain our closest living primate relatives, there is now no evidence that Homo sapiens somehow evolved from chimpanzee-like individuals, losing chimp characteristics over time. Instead, after the chimp/hominid split, the two groups appear to have gone their separate evolutionary ways, developing the unique traits seen in each today.

Alan Walker, a professor of biological anthropology at Pennsylvania State University who did not work on the project, said that the Ardipithecus fossils "tell us that the anatomy of closely related living species cannot predict the anatomy of their ancestors very accurately."

Walker said, "It now seems, from the analyses carried out by the discoverers and their colleagues, that the last common ancestor of chimpanzees and humans was much less chimpanzee-like than previously thought."

He concluded that the unveiling of the new hominid "is certain to cause considerable rethinking of not only our evolutionary past, but also that of our living relatives the great apes."

pretty things

I'm taking a calligraphy course at the Smithsonian this fall! It's very exciting -- I can't want to make beautiful things. (Hopefully, I will have time to practice!)

poems, love

I have always loved this excerpt from the Leaves of Grass. It makes me so tranquil and pleased inside. (And I leave for a wedding in Ireland soon!)

Walt Whitman (1819–1892). Leaves of Grass. 1900.

A GLIMPSE, through an interstice caught,

Of a crowd of workmen and drivers in a bar-room, around the stove, late of a winter night—And I unremark’d seated in a corner;

Of a youth who loves me, and whom I love, silently approaching, and seating himself near, that he may hold me by the hand;

A long while, amid the noises of coming and going—of drinking and oath and smutty jest,

There we two, content, happy in being together, speaking little, perhaps not a word.

dogs and intelligence/culture

Babies Grasp Dogs' Emotions

By Jeanna Bryner, Senior Writer

posted: 22 July 2009 07:57 am ET

Dogs may be man's best friend, but babies might also really understand Fido.

A new study found that 6-month-olds can match the sounds of an angry snarl or friendly yap with photos of dogs showing the corresponding body language.

The results, published in the July issue of the journal Developmental Psychology, suggest that babies can decipher emotions even before they learn how to talk.

"Emotion is one of the first things babies pick up on in their social world," said lead researcher Ross Flom, a psychology professor at Brigham Young University in Utah.

Barking dogs

The study involved 128 infants, with 32 from each of four age groups (6, 12, 18 and 24 months), who had little or no exposure to dogs. The babies first looked at two images of the same fluffy canine, one showing the dog in an aggressive posture and facial expression while the other showed the dog in a friendly stance. The researchers wanted to figure out whether infants had a preference for one expression over the other before including the dog barks. They didn't.

Then, the researchers played a 2-second sound clip of either a friendly or threatening dog bark while the child viewed the two images. In the next trial, the other sound clip (aggressive or friendly) was played.

The researchers videotaped the young participants as they looked at one or both of the dog images (or glanced around the room, at a parent, or elsewhere). The 6-month-old babies spent most of their time staring at the matching photograph, so a mean bark would garner a stare at the dog with the vicious facial expression.

"The six-month-olds would look in that direction and kept looking in that direction," Flom told LiveScience. "The older kids would glance at it and then kind of look away as if to say, 'Oh yeah, I get it, it goes with that face. The task is ridiculous. I'm going to move on and look somewhere else around the room.'"

Baby smarts

The results suggest both 6-month-olds and babies up to 2 years old could distinguish a rowdy bark from a benign one. But the older babies just showed their correct responses differently than the 6-month-olds.

Past research in the field of baby smarts has relied on the proportion of time a baby looks in a certain direction or the proportion of time he or she exhibits some other signal of response to show a baby's skills in distinguishing facial expressions or intonations in speech patterns. These studies have suggested that while 6-month-olds are experts in verbal and facial perception even when it comes to monkeys, as they get older they lose this ability.

The idea is that babies are born with a full toolbox of broad abilities. Over time, as they experience the world, the toddlers refine their abilities and focus on what's really relevant, say, human faces rather than monkey or dog mugs.

But according to the new results, perhaps the little ones don't lose the ability, Flom said. They just show it differently. So instead of calculating the time spent looking in a certain direction, researchers could take into account a baby's first glance, he added.

happiness studies; great articles

I'm currently temping at the Atlantic magazine -- it's great -- I get to read so many fascinating things! Check out the amazing article on "What Makes Us Happy" by Joshua Wolf Shenk. It is long but definitely worth the read. I think the Grant Study is truly fascinating and I can't wait to learn more about it.

I like the cover a lot too -- and scientists say that orange is one of the happiest colors!

delicious treats

Yesterday I decided to bake my roommate, Mike, a special cupcake treat in honor of his birthday. I am definitely not a baker or cook by any means, but I am trying to be more domestic. I wanted to do something fun, but also simple, so I made red-velvet cupcakes with white chocolate-cream cheese frosting. After encountering the Pie of the Tiger blog, I decided to add a raspberry to the middle of each cupcake that had been stuffed with two white chocolate morsels. (They used ganache and scooped out the middle of the cupcakes, I just dropped a stuffed raspberry in while baking... [read: they actually know what they're doing]) The melted chocolate and raspberry are actually a nice surprise when you bite into the middle.

I have craved delicious frosting ever since visiting Magnolia bakery with my best friend so I wanted to make the icing from scratch. (I dislike the store-bought tubs.) I used Kraft's "White Chocolate-Cream Cheese Frosting" recipe and it turned out fluffy and delicious! Looks like my profile image, ta da:

meeting influential people and good restaurants

It's always exciting to meet celebrities or important people. I've been very fortunate to meet so many significant leaders through my parents and friends. Last Wednesday, while out to dinner with my father at Agraria on the Georgetown Waterfront, my dad introduced me to the Ambassador from Mali who was eating with Congressman Pomeroy from North Dakota. Both the Ambassador and the Congressman were very interesting, and Congressman Pomeroy loved telling me all about how Agraria was a farmer-friendly restaurant focused on sustainability.

I am a big advocate for the environment and recycling, so any restaurant that promotes sustainable farming, conservation and preserving biodiversity ranks very high on my list. The food was also unique and delicious -- plus the manager gave us two complimentary glasses of wine. Though we didn't get to sit outside, the weather was beautiful and the breeze blowing off of the water made for a great evening.

summer baseball games

I love going to baseball games. So far this summer I've been to two Nationals games - one against the Atlanta Braves (my fave team!) and the other against the Cubs. Unfortunately both times the teams I rooted for (1st time Braves, 2nd time Nats) lost, but the weather was so fantastic that I didn't complain. The Nationals Stadium is absolutely great; it's easy to get to on the metro, beer is plentiful and of course the hot dogs are delicious. I actually love sitting higher up or in the outfield when I go, not only because I'm broke ($20 seats baby), but also the breeze is perfect and there is always so much to see.


Hands down, best part of a Nats game: THE PRESIDENTS RACE. (Apparently Teddy never wins - check out the blog.) I'm posting a video from an older race when Teddy get's tackled by the B'more Oriole -- soo funny!

Presidents Race: Orioles Bird tackles Teddy Roosevelt from Presidents Race on Vimeo.

Here is a fun photo of my lovely friend Courtney at the Nats v. Braves game enjoying my favorite beer, Bud Light Lime! (I'm honestly not lying, I love love love it... and no I'm not crazy)

happiness article

This is so true - I hate being alone -- except for when it gives me the chance to reflect on how much I enjoy other people.

"Almost every person feels happier when they're with other people," observes Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. "It's paradoxical because many of us think we can hardly wait to get home and be alone with nothing to do, but that's a worst-case scenario. If you're alone with nothing to do, the quality of your experience really plummets."

Read more: http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1015902-7,00.html#ixzz0fYofpH6d

meeting influential people

My friend Chris was kind enough to take me to the Republican Senate House Dinner and who did I see? Whelp, you guessed it, Sarah Palin! Though I'm not a fan of her politics by any means, it was still exciting to meet her. Some photos I took with my phone while waiting to shake her hand are below.

She said, "Hi, I'm Sarah!" to every single person... and she wasn't as pretty or impressive as I'd imagined, but ah well.
This little Asian lady was so eager to meet her that I decided to snap their picture. She was very impressed that I said "you're welcome" in Mandarin when she thanked me for taking her picture (using her camera).

quotes

Life is hopeless but not serious. - Hungarian Proverb

Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh... -Kahlil Gibran

All the knowledge I possess everyone else can acquire, but my heart is all my own. - Goethe




happy bday cricket

quotes

I love quotations and have been collecting them since my junior year of high school. I'll have to start posting some of the new ones I encounter here.

I was once very religious (I think more hopeful than faithful) - so I have a lot of biblical and faith based quotes. It's amazing how much a person can change - I am almost in complete disagreement with the last one.

A few from an old journal:

"I have learned to be content whatever the circumstance" Philippians 4:11

"...I entrust my tree to its God. He who made it knows better than a man like me what it needs. I gave God no constraints or conditions, except to pray. 'Lord, send what it needs - whether that be a storm or sunshine, wind, rain or frost. You made it, and you know best what it needs.'"

best pig in the world

These are videos of my lil Frenchie, Cricket. He unfortunately passed away due to health issues, but I loved him very much. Thinking about him always makes me happy, though it's bittersweet. I hope you find him as adorable as I did.


cricket's lil waddle


cricket playing in the grass







the last one actually isn't cricket, but it reminds me of him.
green dress / la robe verte

random websites and internet finds

I don't know how or when exactly I encountered the explodingdog website but this is one of my favorite drawings that the artist has done. You submit phrases or titles to him and then he draws whatever inspires him from the title.... it seems like the website has really taken off since I first visited. You can even get ipod skins and other items with the doodles now.


This is a pretty old one that I loved and have had bookmarked for a few years (since 2006). It is so sweet!




i have been thinking about you all day


















* http://www.explodingdog.com/

beautiful ways to make me a better person and improve my life.

This was written on a jar of Turkish Delight that I received as a gift when I was studying abroad in Istanbul. It makes me happy and is a great way to live.

be as a river in givingness and generosity.

be as the earth in humbleness and modesty.

be as the sun in tenderness and mercy.

be as a corpse in anger and fury.

be as the night in concealing others' faults.

be as you act and act as you are.

*mevlana celaleddin rumi